CHILD ABUSE

1. Introduction

2. Different kinds of child abuse

2.1. Physical abuse

2.2. Sexual abuse

2.3. Emotional abuse

3. Noticing abuse

4. The victims

5. The abuser

6. Help

1. Introduction

Most children are brought up in happy, loving families, but for a huge number of children these needs are not fulfilled.

During the past few years, society has begun to recognise that relationship between children and adults often goes wrong - sometimes violently wrong.

Child abuse is a delicate subject. Although everyone agrees that it exists, finding an exact definition is difficult.

You could say:

" Child abuse is a prison of fear and lies. A child abused is left with scars that take a long time to heal. Some children may never fully recover unless they receive help."

2. Different kinds of child abuse

Every year 150 - 200 children die of child abuse in Britain. There are several

different types of child abuse, although the exact categories vary from country to

country. In Britain five types of abuse are recognised: physical abuse, sexual abuse,

neglect, emotional abuse and failure to thrive. In many cases children don't suffer

only from one type, for example, sexual abuse often includes emotional abuse.

2.1. Physical abuse

Physical abuse is the most recognised type of abuse, because the consequences, like

broken bones, burns, bites, bruises and brain damages are often visible.

But many injuries look like the result of everyday accidents and abusers use this fact

to avoid suspicion.

To decide if an injury is the result of physical abuse or not, you have to think of some

factors:

- Is this the first time the child has suffered from this injury?

- Is the explanation of the parents how the injury happened possible or not?

- Was the child brought straight to hospital or was there a delay?

In general a small amount of physical punishment is considered as normal. Many

parents smack their children, when they are naughty. This shows their helplessness.

They don't know how to treat their children. Instead of talking or explaining parents

often lose their temper and become aggressive. But isn't this sort of punishment a

kind of abuse either? Where should we draw the line between punishment and abuse?

Besides physical punishment doesn't produce better-behaved children. Parents have

to set limits to change their behaviour. With smacking they only tell their children

what they have done wrong but not what they should make better.

2.2. Sexual abuse

Sexual abuse is now considered to be the most harmful type of abuse.

There are three main types:

- Incest: abuse in the family, for example between children and their biological or step-parents, or between brothers and sisters. Most of the cases of sexual abuse is incest.

- Abuse between stranger and a child (including paedophile abuse)

- Sexual exploitation (pornographic films or books, child prostitution)

Sexual abuse is heavily discovered, because the child is mostly frightened by the abuser and sometimes he or she thinks it's his/her own fault or they feel ashamed. Children normally trust their parents, they admire and love them. First kids believe that everything what Mum or Dad is doing is good. So when they realise that the relationship is not "normal", that there are things which hurt them, kids think that it is their own fault and not the one of their perfect parents. They feel ashamed and try to keep it secret.

The average age of a sexually abused child is ten years and 80% of these children registered as being abused were girls.

2.3. Emotional abuse

Emotional abuse is the most difficult category of abuse to define. It is so closely

connected with the other types of abuse.

Generally emotional abuse is when parents are unable to show their child love and

affection, or when they threaten or shout at the child all the time, so that he/she loses

self-confidence and becomes nervous. Constant hassle and criticism instead of praise

and love have serious effects on the child's personality. For example, it might be hard

for them to form successful relationships.

3. Noticing abuse

When children start to behave in the following ways they might be victims of abuse or exploitation:

- Bed-wetting, nightmares, fear of going to bed, insomnia

- Changes in behaviour, extreme mood swings, excessive crying

- Unusual interest in sexual matters

- Bruises, cuts or poorly explained injuries

- Pain, bleeding, fluid or rawness in the private areas

- School problems

4. The victims

Abused children come from all types of families. Some children who are raised in

poor conditions live in happy and safe families. Others may live in rich houses but are

abused.

Risk factors:

- Children are more at risk to be physically abused in families where is

unemployment, where the father is a manual worker and where is a conflict

between the parents.

- Of sexual abuse: Children are at risk from stepfathers and if one of the family

members was sexually abused as a children themselves.

- Of exploitation: runaways (Ironically: Most of them flee from homes where they

have been abused)

- Mentally handicapped children, because they can't defend themselves

Reaction of abused children:

- Some children try hard to avoid abuse: they are anxious, sensitive and over

attentive,

- Others do nothing against it, because they are afraid the abuse will get harder: are

very active, clumsy, careless and have often accidents,

- Stop enjoying things children usually enjoy to do, acting like grown-ups

- Children often blame themselves for what is happening, because they trust on

their parents (who are often the abusers) and consider them perfect.

Consequently it can only be their own fault.

5. The abuser

Abusers are fathers, mothers, friends and relations. Only occasionally they are stranger. 90% of sexual abuse is committed by men, but physical abuse is committed by men and women equally.

There are two groups of abuser

- Abuse connected with background: unemployment, abused as a child, alcohol problem,

- Abuse connected with personality: Outwardly he is often isolated, impulsive and self-righteous. But inside he feels confused, frustrated, powerless and dependent.

The sexual abuser is often moralistic, shy and uses intellectual and rational

arguments to explain his behaviour. Many of the abusers were victims of abuse themselves. According to some experts women who has been sexually abused as a child are attracted to an abusive type of man. (her daughters and sons might also be abused!)

6. Help

The help is different in every country. Often there isn't enough evidence to prove that

abuse has taken place, but almost every child who says she/he is a victim, tells the

truth. Piecing the child's story together may be a slow and painful process.

For a social worker it's a very difficult decision to take they child away or not. If he

risks to let the child stay at home and it is seriously abused again, or even killed it's

his fault. On the other hand if he takes the child away and later he found out the

child's story isn't true it can be a big damage for the family.

Many children often don't tell about the abuse, because they are afraid their family

will be separated and he/she has to stay at a home or in a foster care. So it depends

on the case what's the right thing that should be done.

Legal situation:

Definition: A child is a person under the age of 18. Abuse occurs when adults hurt children, either physically or in some other way.

The age of consent is in various countries different.

* If a girl has sexual intercourse below this age she will not commit a criminal offence; a boy

does.

In the USA these information depends on different state laws. In a lot of states homosexual intercourse is illegal and therefore forbidden. Noticeable are also the differences between man&man and woman&woman.

It's no surprise that in Thailand these laws are not so strict as in the other countries, because of the sex tourism.

Statutes of limitation:

If someone becomes a victim as an adult he/she has to report it within 2 or 3 years.

Persons who were victims in their childhood have no statutes of limitation.